


Cats and Dogs

by mywordsflyup



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, F/M, also illegal pet owners, cute idiots being terrible neighbors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 03:22:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3513413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mywordsflyup/pseuds/mywordsflyup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neighbor AU:<br/>Their landlord doesn't allow pets. Hawke catches Anders looking for his cat. While walking her dog.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cats and Dogs

**Author's Note:**

> Cute Neighbor AUs are my secret Kryptonite. This is just a short, fluffy story about my two favorite idiots being illegal pet owners and all-round terrible neighbors.

The dog was big as a calf, slobbering like a water fountain and it had definitely, unmistakably spotted him. Anders could see his life flashing in front of his eyes as the beast stormed towards him. He let out a muffled scream of terror as the monster broke through the thicket and what felt a hundred pounds of smelly, scratchy fur landed on his chest and pinned him to the ground. 

“Help,” he wheezed but he had no air left to really yell for assistance. Apparently the dog had heard him as it promptly started licking his face. The blood rushing in his ears tuned out almost everything, but Anders still heard a female voice calling out nearby. 

“Oh Maker, Poki! No!” 

Just when Anders had started to accept that he was fated to a death by gigantic dog, he felt the weight being lifted from his chest. Panting he scrambled into a sitting position. The dog-bear-hybrid still had its black eyes pinned on him but at the same time it was being pulled out of the bushes by its collar. When Anders was sure that there was a big enough safety distance between him and the dog, he followed. Dried leaves, twigs and mud covered almost the entirety of his backside and his hands didn't look much better. Groaning he made his way out of the shrubbery and faced whoever had set that monster on him. He recognized her immediately.

“YOU!” he yelled as he pointed a mud-covered finger at her. “I should have known!” 

The girl in front of him was still struggling to put a leash on the dog but looked up when she heard his yelling. From the look on her face it was painfully obvious that she had no idea who he was. 

“Excuse me?” Even if he had not recognized her face, her voice would have been enough for him to identify her. He had heard it often enough through the paper thin walls. It was the Neighbor Girl. Capital letters in his mind. As if her door slamming, her deafening laugh and what he could only assume were impromptu Kanye West dance parties at midnight weren't enough, she now apparently was set on murdering him with her newest torture device of choice. 

“What the hell are you doing with that monster?” His own voice sounded shrill but he did not care. His heart was still racing. 

“Do I know you?” she asked, confusion still blatant on her face. “Look, man. I'm sorry my dog scared you.” She stopped for a moment and furrowed her brow. “But what the hell were you doing in there anyway? In the middle of the night?” 

He ignored her question and stepped a bit closer. The dog was still too overexcited for his taste but she seemed to have a grip on him now. “Your dog nearly bit my head off! That's beyond just scaring!” 

As he stepped into the light of the streetlamp above, something like recognition appeared in her eyes. “Wait a minute!” she called out. “You're that weird guy from my floor!” 

“What's that supposed to mean? How am I the weird one in this scenario?” He could not believe this girl was calling him names when she was the one who obviously used her dog chase people. 

“You're the guy who never empties his mailbox,” she said. “The one with the cat!” 

That took him by surprise. 

“Wait, what?” Anders felt the blood rushing into his head. “Who says I have a cat?” 

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Do you really think I'm that stupid?” 

“I don't even know you,” he said and turned away so she wouldn't see his flushed face. He could hear her laughing softly. 

“Well, I sure do know your cat. Little red tabby? Wanders around the basement all the time?” 

How could she know about the cat? He had tried so hard to keep Ser Pounce a secret. 

“And for someone who claims he doesn't know me, you had no problem yelling at me like a crazy person just then,” she said but from the corner of his eye he could see that she was smirking. “Do you always scream at strange girls on the street?” 

“Only the ones whose dogs try to eat me.” He tried to regain his composure. 

“What were you doing crawling around in those bushes anyway?” she asked. “Can't blame a dog for being curious, you know.” 

Anders could feel his face heating up again. This whole situation was just too ridiculous. But there was no point in lying now. She already knew about Ser Pounce. 

“I was looking for my cat,” he admitted grudgingly. 

“Hah!” The girl started laughing. Anders was sure his face was beet red by now. 

“I could ask you the same question, you know,” he said quickly. 

“What? I wasn't the one crawling around the shrubbery on all fours.” She had a point there. But then it came to him. 

“But why are you taking your dog out for a walk in the middle of the night? Why do you even have a dog at all?” 

She fell silent. After a second, she opened her mouth as if to say something but closed it again. She had nothing. 

“Hah!” It was Anders' turn to be disproportionately triumphant. “You're not even allowed to keep a dog in your apartment!” 

She finally snapped out of her shocked silence. “And you're not allowed to keep a cat!” she snarled. 

They glared at each other in silence for a moment. The dog started whining but even the girl ignored him. For six months, Anders had kept Ser Pounce a secret. Despite the cat's unfortunate tendency to slip out of the apartment at every chance he got, Anders had been sure that nobody in the building had noticed him. And now this. Of all people it had to be the girl whose early Sunday morning music choices basically screamed obnoxiousness. Who had never shown even the slightest indication she was aware that she was not the only person living in the building – perhaps even the world. How could she not only have noticed the cat skulking around the house but also have successfully traced its steps back to his apartment? 

She was the first to break the silence. “Well, it seems we're sitting in the same boat.”

“I wouldn't put it tha-”

“Yes, we are,” she interrupted. “And I don't know about you but I have no intention of ratting out a fellow illegal pet owner. And not just because your cat is really cute.” She gave him a little smile – more shy than he would have expected. He sighed. 

“Yeah, okay. Me neither,” he said. Her smile grew wider. For a horrifying moment he thought she was going to let go of the dog's collar but she only extended one hand to him while keeping a tight grip on the beast with the other. 

“I'm Hawke,” she said and he took a step forward to shake her hand. “Sorry again about Poki. I don't think anyone's ever trained him properly.” Her handshake was firm and she didn't seemed to mind the mud still crusted on his skin. 

“Anders,” he said and quickly pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. The whole thing was just too bizarre. “And I'm afraid I can't return the compliment. Your dog is more terrifying than cute.” 

“But he's still a puppy!” she protested. Anders made a sound that was something between a laugh and an exasperated sigh. 

“Are you telling me that thing is going to get even bigger?”

“Yes?” She petted the monster's head. “Not much though.” 

Anders ran his hands through his hair and shook his head. “You can't keep that dog in your apartment if it's going to grow as big as a horse!” 

“He's not going to be as big as a horse! What are you talking about?” Hawke looked genuinely distressed. 

“Look at his paws! They are gigantic!” He realized that he was yelling again and took a step back. Screaming at his neighbor about her giant dog had not really been his plan for the night. The whole situation just seemed ridiculous to him all of a sudden. But Hawke wasn't even paying attention to him anymore. She was kneeling next to the dog and inspected his paws as if she was seeing them for the first time. 

“They are quite big,” she conceded after a moment and looked up. There was genuine worry in her eyes and he immediately regretted yelling at her. He had never been much of a people person but he was usually at least a little bit better at not immediately alienating people like this. 

“Well, horse might have been a bit exaggerated. Pony, maybe.” 

A grin slowly stretched across her face. “You think?” She got up from the ground and brushed the dirt from her jeans. “But you probably can't keep that cat in your apartment either if he runs away all the time. Someone's bound to notice at some point.” 

Anders shrugged. “As far as I know, you're the first one,” he said. “And he's been living with me for half a year now. I found him last November. I think some asshole hit him with his car and then just left him there.” He still got angry every time he thought about the state Ser Pounce had been in when he had found him. Hawke shook her head in disbelief. 

“Some people are such monsters. Someone abandoned Poki at the gas station I work at two week ago. I couldn't just leave him there so I took him home. Poor guy probably outstayed his welcome as soon as he started growing.” She gently rubbed the spot just behind the dog's ear. 

Anders couldn't help but be surprised. He had not expected to find such a soft side in the girl he had only known as his annoying neighbor for the last couple of months. 

“Perhaps we are sitting in the same boat after all,” he said and cautiously returned her smile. 

“You know, we could help you look for that cat if you want. Poki has an excellent sense of smell.” She petted the dog proudly. 

Anders rolled his eyes. “So he can eat Ser Pounce as soon as we've found him? I don't think so.” 

Now it was Hawke's turn to roll her eyes. “Come on,” she said. “I won't let him off his leash again, I promise. And surely this beats crawling around the bushes on your own all night.” 

He could not argue with that. For some reason the idea of spending more time with this girl wasn't completely repulsive to him. “Alright,” he finally said with a sigh. “But make sure that dog behaves this time.” 

The grin that now spread on her face almost made him regret his decision immediately. “So where should we look first?”


End file.
